by Evada Perón
“In the Year of Darkness, 2012, the rulers of this team devised the ultimate plan. They would reshape the Future by changing the Past. The plan required something that felt no pity. No pain. No fear. Something unstoppable. They created 'THE SCHWARZEMEGGER'”
“In the Year of Darkness, 2012, the rulers of this team devised the ultimate plan. They would reshape the Future by changing the Past. The plan required something that felt no pity. No pain. No fear. Something unstoppable. They created 'THE SCHWARZEMEGGER'”
Photo courtesy of Nicolast Charest for RollerGirl.ca
Name, number: Schwarzemegger #T101
Nickname: Schwarzy
Position(s): Blocker/Jammer
Best quality: Determination
Loves: Dark chocolate and cold beer
Hates: Elbows and Negativity
Super power: Ability to land on my feet
Favorite cat: Hobbes, Calvin's stuffed tiger from the comic books. He's just so cool, calm, and relaxed, but get him wound up and he becomes totally crazy!
If you have had the chance to catch Schwarzy on skates and thought to yourself, “this girl looks familiar,” perhaps you’ve run into her at the Central City Arena in Surrey. This cool cat got the itch to join derby after she started a job working at the roller rink and saw skaters dropping in for practices and public skates. “All these girls came in on roller skates. I had no idea what roller derby was but was pretty stoked to get paid to watch them practice and fetch ice for their bruised knees and tweaked ankles."
Hanging around practices wasn't enough for her, and shortly thereafter Schwarzy bought a ticket to her first roller derby bout. She knew she was hooked after witnessing the Terminal City Rollergirls battle it out on the track. "After I saw that first bout I went out and got my own pair of roller skates so I could attempt to mimic all their sweet moves during downtime at the rink”. It didn’t take long for Schwarzy to find her place with TCRG, as she quickly joined the Volunteer Crew last season and started Fresh Meat in the fall.
During her experiences this past winter as a “fresh meat” member of the league, Schwarzy learned just how tough TCRG skaters are. She describes how practices at the outdoor facility at UBC provided her with this new perspective on her fellow league members, “UBC has a pretty rough surface, and nobody seemed to think anything of shredding up their leggings, knee pads, fingers – you name it. On top of that, we were practicing in sub-zero temperatures – it was cold enough to make your joints freeze up – but everyone still came to practice, put on their game face, and worked their shorts off. I was impressed, and knew I'd have to toughen up if I wanted to stick around this crowd!”
Hanging around practices wasn't enough for her, and shortly thereafter Schwarzy bought a ticket to her first roller derby bout. She knew she was hooked after witnessing the Terminal City Rollergirls battle it out on the track. "After I saw that first bout I went out and got my own pair of roller skates so I could attempt to mimic all their sweet moves during downtime at the rink”. It didn’t take long for Schwarzy to find her place with TCRG, as she quickly joined the Volunteer Crew last season and started Fresh Meat in the fall.
During her experiences this past winter as a “fresh meat” member of the league, Schwarzy learned just how tough TCRG skaters are. She describes how practices at the outdoor facility at UBC provided her with this new perspective on her fellow league members, “UBC has a pretty rough surface, and nobody seemed to think anything of shredding up their leggings, knee pads, fingers – you name it. On top of that, we were practicing in sub-zero temperatures – it was cold enough to make your joints freeze up – but everyone still came to practice, put on their game face, and worked their shorts off. I was impressed, and knew I'd have to toughen up if I wanted to stick around this crowd!”
It wasn’t hard to see that she fit right in with this “tough” derby crowd and in addition to the skills brings to the track; Schwarzy also has exhibited some fierce determination and athleticism. If you caught the Season Opener, you would have seen that even a busted skate couldn't keep her off the track! When one of her own skates broke in the middle of the game, rather than sit out, she quickly borrowed a spare from friend and helped win the bout with two different skates!
Off the track, Schwarzy continues to pursue all kinds of other athletic endeavors. She loves spending time outdoors, smiling as she describes her pastimes: “I shred Grouse and Seymour on my snowboard in the winter and cycle and skate the in the summer. I usually just bike around Vancouver, but any time I can get out of the city I'm off with my bike and my tent for a few days of hard pedaling and bush camping. Also, Booty Quake (TCRG All-star skater and Fresh Meat Coach) inspired me to take up a derby focused off skate fitness routine full of sumo squats, push-ups and lunges that I try to do that on my off days."
Seriously! This girl is a machine!
Schwarzy is looking forward to plenty of new experiences in her first season with the Faster Pussycats, including “traveling and playing plenty of games.” As she prepares for the upcoming game against the Riot Girls on June 9th, she provides a bit of insight in regards to her pre-game ritual. Her pre-bout munchies include a“Peanut butter and banana sandwich on multi-grain bread, topped off with a little bit of honey” and the hours leading up to the first whistle include “putting on my Commando makeup and purple undies (I am a Pussycat, after all).”
As the next game edges closer, Schwarzy explains why fans should sport the black and purple: “We love the game. We really do. We are a pack of fierce kittehs who are crazy about the sport! We train really hard and I think you can really see that when we're on the track together. We are fast on our feet, quick to react, and we've got each other's backs in the pack. Plus, we love our fans!”
If you haven’t clued in to the inspiration behind Schwarzy’s name, then we are assuming you didn’t exist in during the 1980’s or early 90’s. But don’t worry; she is more than eager to explain. “I'm a huge Arnold Schwarzenegger fan. He's kind of a childhood hero of mine. He lays down the law and takes out the bad guys all while spouting out cheesy one-liners and flexing his glorious biceps. He's just so in-your-face all the time. So I figured that if I was going to play a full contact sport like roller derby, I should channel the spirit of Schwarzenegger to help me hold my own in the pack."
If you have had the privilege of watching Schwarzy in action, then you have witnessed first-hand the channeling of the “Terminator” on skates, and if you haven't experienced it yet, then all the more reason to make to the next game on June 9th at Minoru Arena in Richmond. Plus, the entire team will attest…her Austrian accent is amazing.
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